So I was accepted into the School I applied to, however since I had to complete all of my documentation during Mercury Retrograde I wasn't surprised when "upon review" it was determined that I need to complete more General classes before I can begin my program. So there's a slight delay, however I am still on track towards the overall goal. I find myself having dreams or should I say nightmares filled with anxiety about the next phase of my journey, but in the end I know.... well I believe I can overcome them with patience towards myself as well as the proper support.
I took a break from my meds again, this time I am noticing a few side-effects which I will discuss in therapy along with my Doctor and see if possibly changing medication or something could be beneficial. It seems to be contributing to my weight gain, and I think it goes without saying that I am unhappy about it. I know this may sound odd, but I'd rather be "skinny" and "crazy" than overweight and "sane". Does that seem foolish? Oh well... One thing I am learning to embrace is "my truth", that's a term I've used throughout my life, however these days it means more to me than ever before. I completely understand what may be true for someone else may not be true for me and vice versa; yet I haven't always operated from that standpoint. I've realized how that could cause confusion in manifesting my own wants, needs as well as desires. However I've noticed once I made that change of focus things began to work out better for my interests than they had in the past.
As I battle with finding as well as maintaining inspiration, I will try to post more often; it is my desire to blog daily or at least weekly, I'll make a better effort and see if anything changes. On another note, I found myself in need of a muse, it seems the passion I had for writing may have diminished (a bit); I am slightly sure of the cause, however I do not know how to improve it. I feel as if that part is out of my hands and is up to the Universe, fate, destiny and all of that to come into play. I could be wrong, but for now I am willing to let go of any attempts to control the situation(s) surrounding these challenges. I believe once the Cosmos settle down a bit (seeing that we are still in Pluto and Neptune Retrogrades) I am positive that has a lot to do with the way things are flowing throughout my life as of late. I have no desire to get into any of that in this post, but since I have therapy tomorrow, perhaps I will have more to write about in the days to come.
Goodnight.
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